Montana Democrats Still Refuse to Show Up to Work, But Pick Their Nose on Camera


Montana Democrats are still abstaining from showing up to work in the legislature, ever afraid of a chest-cold that is far less lethal than Planned Parenthood. With a death-rate hovering around .04% of those who get the Wuhan Flu, it’s safe to call Democrats sunshine patriots, legislating from home in the comfort of their own abode.

Delaying legislative work by insisting on quarrantining themselves from representing the people, Democrats are taking advantage of the option to phone it in, made possible by Republican leadership that desire to appease their colleagues on the left for some inexplicable reason.

When Democrats do show up to the People’s House to conduct business, like Darth Dunwell, they wear multiple masks despite the science indicating that masks serve as nothing but placebo pacifiers for emotionally fragile snowflakes who are afraid of the sniffles.

There’s one downside to Zooming it in, however. The camera is always watching. And in one case, Rep. Denise Hayman (D-HD66) showed up to a committee meeting to represent…well…her nasal mucus.

Finally, Rep. Hayman has demonstrated a legitimate reason to wear a mask. Nobody wants to see that.

The incessant desire to mask-up or abstain from attendance at the work they’re elected to do, Democrats are making personal health decisions not based upon science, but upon superstition. In their minds, it seems, good vibes and good intentions can somehow prevent people from catching the cold.

The following scientific studies all demonstrate that masks do not prevent viruses ranging from the common cold to the seasonal flu to even COVID-19 (see below).

Jacobs, J. L. et al. (2009) “Use of surgical face masks to reduce the incidence of the common cold among health care workers in Japan: A randomized controlled trial,” American Journal of Infection Control, Volume 37, Issue 5, 417 – 419.

N95-masked health-care workers (HCW) were significantly more likely to experience headaches. Face mask use in HCW was not demonstrated to provide benefit in terms of cold symptoms or getting colds.

Cowling, B. et al. (2010) “Face masks to prevent transmission of influenza virus: A systematic review,” Epidemiology and Infection, 138(4), 449-456. review/64D368496EBDE0AFCC6639CCC9D8BC05

None of the studies reviewed showed a benefit from wearing a mask, in either HCW or community members in households (H). See summary Tables 1 and 2 therein.

bin-Reza et al. (2012) “The use of masks and respirators to prevent transmission of influenza: a systematic review of the scientific evidence,” Influenza and Other Respiratory Viruses 6(4), 257–267.

“There were 17 eligible studies. … None of the studies established a conclusive relationship between mask/respirator use and protection against influenza infection.”

Smith, J.D. et al. (2016) “Effectiveness of N95 respirators versus surgical masks in protecting health care workers from acute respiratory infection: a systematic review and meta-analysis,” CMAJ Mar 2016

“We identified six clinical studies … . In the meta-analysis of the clinical studies, we found no significant difference between N95 respirators and surgical masks in associated risk of (a) laboratory-confirmed respiratory infection, (b) influenza-like illness, or (c) reported work-place absenteeism.”

Offeddu, V. et al. (2017) “Effectiveness of Masks and Respirators Against Respiratory Infections in Healthcare Workers: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis,” Clinical Infectious Diseases, Volume 65, Issue 11, 1 December 2017, Pages 1934–1942,

Picking your nose, on the other hand, actually incurs signficant health dangers including abrasions in the nose that increase the chance of infection, bacterial infection from unkempt finger nails, and even tearing a hole in your nasal septum.

Also, it’s gross.

But have no fear, the nose-picking, mask-wearing Democrat absentees are still able to vote on bills remotely – even with one finger currently occupied digging for snot. Yesterday, Rep. Hayman voted against HB394, exempting carbon-capture equipment and renewable energy supplies from property tax.

Her vote against the bill seems odd for an avid environmentalist, but then again, so does picking her nose on camera.


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